yea ..i havent written in here for a longgggg time..but it aint like any1 reads it anyway..plus im kinda dedicated 2 livejournal.. but i guess ill just copy n paiste my entrys..

iight well..im kinda really tired so this is porolly gonna b short..
well lots of bad shit been goin on wit me n jose but wuts new..but this time its really bad..like..he just got me hurtin sooo fuckin much..all the shit hes doin n hes turnin on every1..i cant stand 2 c en like this..yall dont understand i knew his ass forever n seein em b so perfect of a person b4 n now turn into wut he has fuckin kills me..n trust me..im not the only 1 who sees it..other ppl who grew up wit em like i did c that shit just as much as me..iight well yea jose jsut got me really fuckin hurtin i want em..i wonna b by him through all wut he does..nomatter wut he does..i wonna b in that passanger seat n shit wit em u kno..thats pose 2 b me..not sum fuckin hoe hes tryn fuck..i cant deal wit all of it..god I WISH I WAS A KID AGAIN!..damn i wish i was fuckin 12 again...so i can live everything over..n not have 2 worry bout real shit..just b a kid..or shit at least b able 2 act like 1..not worry bout nuthin..just chill..b with my FRIENDS.. n have nuthin real 2 worry bout..n i KNOW im not the only one who wants that shit..n wut i dont get..is how they gonna wish that n then still actually have that chance n still tryna grow the fuck up so fast..i dont get em..ne ways.. well

*WEDNESDAY* joses sister got christian n was keepin em over night..so at like 230 i went over in the neighborhood..n went to joeys then we went to philips n johnathan was there..n then eric came n then we all left n chilled sumwhere...i dun really remember we just met up wit every1 else..n umm..o yea lmao this was soo fuckin funny..joey went to daniels n then we c daniels dad runnin the house wit a big wooded stick...lmao it was so funny cuz he was really gonna beat joey wit it lol n joey was runnin n shit..then joey would come 2 em when his back was turned n throw rocks at em n run..n he kept chasin em lmao all over 23st n andrews..lmao..n then joey comes up wit 2 big huge sticks n was like "ima beat his ass now" n he throws the sticks at his truck n runs..lmao wtf was that?? lmao..ne ways then me philip n johnathan went to nessas n then we went to amps n seen him n jay..then back 2 nessas i think..n just chilled n then me nphilip got 2 chill alone by the pool for a lil bit..it was nice cuz like..the wind was kinda blowin n stuff n u c the palm trees blowin n shit..it was nice iiight well then i got my dad 2 pick me up at like 2 n then went home n passed out....

*THURSDAY* i went n took the bus over 2 go 2 philips at like 330..n i stopped by monicas n mannys n seen them..n i seen sonia n sean..n chilled at monicas for a lil bit then me n manny went to philips..n they had just left so we went to joeys n was wit joeys wierd ass for a while..then jose n michael n andrew n i think wooodlet was drivin down the street..ugh..i hate fuckin seein jose round there..i fuckin hate it..cuz it makes me wonna go b by him n shit..n i cant..cuz i kno hes just gonna talk shit 2 me..i just wonna chill wit em..i fuckin miss jose sooo fuckin much..ugh ne ways..then i got upset thinkin bout em n shit cuz of how bad i wanted 2 b wit em n he was right there so me n manny went to nessas n got her n came back n met up wit philip eric n joey..n um..i had got so mad that day...i dunno my temper was just short as fuck ..i guess cuz i kept thinkin bout jose..well then they drunk n shit n we went all over n me n philip was doin wut we do..ohh yea n we seen jason at daniels..it was sooo wierd cuz like..i was lik 2 feet from him..i unno it wa sjust wierd ne ways..n o yea while they was drinkin me n michael was talkin for a longgg while..like a real ass conversation..the type u cant have wit any1 n when sum1 actually understands u..u kno..well yea we was talkin n shit n it was good..man i fuckin missed michael..im glad hes back in my life....well we both had alot 2 agree on bout shit thats goin on wit ppl n stuff..n damn u kno fuckin wut..im gettin so tired of talkin bout jose..i really fuckin am..its just that hes always in my head so its like thats all i can really talk bout..thats the main thing 2 me...but its makin me so sick..n i KNOW every1 else is soo tired of hearin bout em..im sure every1 will say.."all that gurl does is talk bout jose" sorry ppl..i dont mean 2..yall would just have 2 understand everything im goin through n all wut me n jose been through..ne ways.. well um..ne ways ..the boys r all gonna go campin n shit this weekend for michaels birthday so i aint goin over there for a while.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY MICHAEL! ohh yea n me n philip had a good conversation 2..a real ass 1 that we been needed 2 have.it really cleared up sum shit.iight well 2day me n ness got sum shit 2 do...ohhh ye ai got such good fuckin news... yall kno that the only thing that been stoppin me from fightin maria is i thought id lose michael again..well he said that hes gonna stay outta it..that we gona fight n thats it..as long as everything is fair like 1 on 1 n shit..n i KNOW i aint jumpin her ..i dun need 2..i dun need no whepons all i need is my fists trust me..mannnnnnnn i cant wait till that time comes lemmi tell u...iight well ima go cuz i jsut woke up..so ill ttyL

iight there it is...ill ttyL

http://www.livejournal.com/users/babygurl042704

*all about you*

full name: Shannon Rae Gruber
if you could change your name, what would you change it to?: i dunno prolly sumthin like Sheena
age: 19
if you could be any other age, what age would you be?: i would b 12 again :(
height: 5' or 5'1
shoe Size: 6 1/2
hair color: blondish brown wit blonde tips n sum highlights
eye color: Blue
what's one thing that makes you unique?: my personailty
what are your best features? (on your face): my eyebrows/eyes
what about your body are you most confident about?: my no no spot...n my butt
most self-conscious about?: everything about me

*favorite*

hangouts: anywhere thats entertaining me..mostly the Beach & Adventura,any mall pretty much n movies..certain pplz house
websites: ebay ;)
movies: "POTC"Catwoman"Enough"
music: type of music ? Rap n R&B
stores: ehh..i dunno it jsut depends wut has wut i like..im VERY picky
about the Opposite sex: EYES n LiPs

*LEAST favorite*

bands/groups: anything Rock
song: anything Rock

*do you*

like your appearance?: no ..but when im naked or in lingerie it might b different sumtimes
like your personality?: sumtimes
think you're funny?: not funny like alotta ppl i kno..but i can make ppl laugh..but i personally dont really think i am
have a lot of friends?: FRIENDS..no
usually go out on Friday nights?: no..i want 2...n im in the process of trying 2 b able 2 though
believe in love at first sight?: i dunno..i believe thers only ONE love for u..so i guess if its that 1 person..then yea
have a boy/girl friend? If so, who?:no.. sadly dunno wut we are anymore..but im madly in love with him n its not goin nowhere

*friends*

about how many friends do you have?: FRIENDS..a few......but like..2 ppl i can TRUST
who can make you smile, no matter what mood you are in?: jose
do any of your friends just piss you off?: YES..omg YESSSSS
do you get sick of your friends easily?: no
which friend do you secretly LOVE?: none..thats stupid..how ya gonna secretly love sum1
is there someone of the opposite sex who you are comfortable enough with to talk about almost anything?: yes..JOSE..Russell..Manny..X..james..

*love*

have you ever been in love?: YES..IN LOVE..yes..thers a difference between loving sum1...n being IN love..in love is both ppl share the same feeling..LOVE
have you ever wished it was more "socially acceptable" for a girl to ask a guy out?: i dun really care..i think it is alright for a gurl 2 ask out a guy..but i wouldnt recomend it
have you ever been attracted to someone physically unattractive?: YES
what's more important, love or sex?: LOVE
would you still carry out a relationship if you family absolutely hated the person you were dating?: YES

*have you ever...*

drank?: Yea..actually alot
smoked?: yes..unfortunatly
done drugs?: yea..
did anything sexual?: lmao...hmmmm.....have i? lmao
grinded with a complete stranger?: umm...
told someone you loved them?: yes
meant it?: yes
needed to tell somebody something but were afraid you couldn't trust them?: YESsss
got in a fight?: haha...quite a few
felt suicidle?: i have b4..but wouldnt ever

*past, present & future*

right now, what is your biggest regret?: who i lost my virgity 2,help fuck up me n josez relationship by being 2 controlive,kissing jason,dropping out of school
list some things you want to do before you turn 18: haha..thats not funny
what do you think would be the worst way to die?: alone..n in love without that person
best way to die?: olddddddd age
write your own gravestone engraving: ummm..thats iight
what song will be played at your funeral?: omg i do not like thinking about this

*i wish...*

i had...: JOSE my own buisness n a car n licence n lots of other things
i didn't have...: 2 grow up
i could...: get everything i wanted n needed
my family...: learned 2 communicate without screaming
*random*

if you could plan your own birthday party, and money was no object, what would you do?: go out of the unided states.wit everyone who mattered 2me..2 wherever..havent decided yet

if your house suddenly caught on fire and you could save 3 things, what would you save?: my family,animals,pictures n everything jose gave me..thats more then 3

what would you throw into the fire?: me....naw just kiddin

is there something that you totally oppose? (Ex. Abortion, gays, biracial dating etc): no

if you got pregnant when you were really young, like 14, would you have an abortion?: yes..unless wit jose

who would you risk your life for?: Jose..christian..my dad n mom ,my sisters..n briana
how easy is it to make you laugh?: depends on who u r..n what mood im in

heyy....whoaa ya GOTTAAA c CATWOMAN....thats one of the best fuckin movies..well..i aont dun shit...ill update Later

well um lets see.....well theres sum shit thats goin on that TERRIBLE but im not gonna say anything at all about it cuz im tryin everything i can 2 NOT think about it.......ok well....

Tuesday~me n heatha went to the mall n got sum shit..we brought Christian wit us..it was str8......then after i went home n sonia was there..i chilled iw ther..kaila came over....we was gonna og whoop this one bitch who keeps callin me talkin shit but deccided it would b better 2 wait....well...they spent the night n left the next day at like 11:00am ..i slept till like 3 then got up..then went back 2 sleep til 7 n at 7 sonia n kaila came back n chilled for a bit..then called victor 2 pick em up....then thats bout it for Wednesday...

Thursday~ me n monica went to the mall..we brought christian..DAMNNN we Got ALOTTT of shit......tyte ass shit...that made us happy....then i didnt get home til like..830 then didnt go 2 fuckin sleep til 5 cuz sum lil guy name CHRISTIAN wouldnt let me sleep.....

Friday~ Sonia came over around 6pm we chilled....i talked 2 this gurl i aint talked 2 since fuckin middle school..it was str8 talkin 2 her.....ne ways..me n sonia chilled n went around this neighborhood.....n we realized how easy it is 2 use guys for shit..lmao...ne ways...well she left at like 930

n 2day ima chill wit sonia..heatha..n monica...n who knows who else...dunno iight then..later

yea..umm....well..i was spose 2 go 2 the beach wit heather n monica...but it was rainin so we didnt..then they decided 2 go n chill wit eachother without me so....umm yea....ne way...im pissed of right now...........NEways...o yea lemmi update for the 4th.....

4th of july....i got a big ass bottle of bacardi puerto rican rum n sum "211" n went 2 monicaz  where heather n monica was n we were waitin for ness 2 get back home..while we were waitin me n heather decided 2 start drinkin the 211 n we got a lil bit TiPsY off that....then we all went 2 nessaz n on our way we seen jose james n x by the bleachers by the tracks n they didnt kno who we were we was screamin shit 2 em"want sucky" 2 c wut they would do..they kept walkin....ne way...we met ness by the corner store at the end of her street..we needed 2 get sumshit...n then we seen eric n joey n they was like"HEY!!!!Y dont u chill wit us" we were like...yeaaaaaaa right...uh huh..well b back...wit no intentions 2 come back ne ways well when we got 2 vanessaz (DAMN IM GOIN WAYYY 2 MUCH INTO DETAIL) ok well we got there n started drinkin n shit i was the bartender n 1st i wanted 2 take str8 shots..me n vanessa took em str8 heather n monica couldnt do it so they mixed theirs..so we just mixed em all...in total i had bout 15 shots..i was FUCKEDDDD UPP lol ne way then we went to the pool n sum shit happened n then sum1 flipped out n shit n n then sum1 else flipped out ..n jose had came 2 me n was talkin shit he was mad or sumthin.....n then it was just like soo crazy.........n LMAO....ima write "funny shit on the 4th" after im done..iight well..at like 12 we took a cab home..i was soooooooo fuckin drunk i couldnt c the money n i counted it 20 times n couldnt tell if it was 9 dollars........talk about DRUNK....n then we went in the house..n me n heather kept on drinkin whoa.....got more drunk....shit happened...alot...n then we went to sleep at like 5...i woke up at 6 pukin n spinnin n shit.....n was fuckin drunk till tuesday..then had the WORSTTT hangover....ohh man..i had my fill of liquor for a loooooongggggg while...iight ima finish later i gotta go now...found sumthin 2 do..iight LaTeR